collapse

* Welcome!

* Important Links

* Chat Box

Guest Friendly. No advertising please.

* BR Councils

* COTM and TOTM

* COTY and TOTY

Character of the Year


Thread of the Year

* Affliates

Affiliate with Us

Blood Rites RPG

Listed At

RPG-D Nerd Listings

Our Affiliates

   

* Credits

RSS Feed  Facebook  Tumblr    E-Mail

Canon: © Anne Bishop
Board's Plot: Blood Rites
Points Scheme: Mother Night
Ratio System: Blood Rites

Blood Rites best viewed in Firefox.
Established February 2010
by Jamie, Gina & Bowie.


* Plot Information for Glacia

Relentlessly persecuting the Light Jeweled of Glacia for their deficit, Elisif Brenden, the Queen, encourages adherence to all precepts of the Dark Religion. Dark Jewels who do not conform are forcefully brought into the fold and Light Jewels found in opposition are broken or executed for their mistakes. There can be no leniency in the frozen territory.
Culture of Glacia
The Dark Religion
Smuggling in Glacia
Priestess & Law
Black Widows

* Welcome Guests

You are currently viewing our forum as a Guest. While you can see all we do, you can't participate. Please think about joining, we love new players. Click Here for more information.


Author Topic: In 2...3... Out 2...3...  (Read 283 times)

Description: tag; Jake || Set in Autumn 192 || tw: allusions to self-harm

Offline Warren Winters

  • Character Account
    • white2te
    • warlord
    • Role

      Head Chef

    • Faction

      Ivalo Province Court

    • Territory

      Glacia

    • Character Sheet

      [Link]

    • OOC

      WrenStar

    • Posts

      33

    • View Profile
In 2...3... Out 2...3...
« on: Jun 05, 18, 10:03:55 AM »
Warren was struggling far more than he would have liked. Well... he would have liked not to have been struggling at all, and at this point he didn't care whether the lack of struggle came with brainwashing or freedom. He just... wasn't sure if he was going to be able to do this more often than not. The living weight about his throat was heavy and unquestionable. It was warm to his skin - just a little warmer than maybe it was supposed to be, because of the buzz of power inside of it. Or maybe that was just his imagination and his constant awareness of the thing that made it constantly feel like it was about to blow at any moment, encompassing him in a supernova of fire and pain.

At least he'd been able to keep face in front of Miina. Well, when he'd seen her. He wasn't proud to say he'd been avoiding her, but he had, managing to limit their interactions to brief almost in-passing intervals a few times a day. They were never alone together. Right now he wasn't sure how long he'd hold up if that happened, especially if she asked him how he was doing.

He wasn't sure how well he'd be able to lie to her.

So he avoided it. He kept to the kitchen or to his rooms. He desperately tried not to walk around like a terrified kicked puppy, surrounded by flesh-eaters. He tried not to notice the approval on some of the others' faces - dark and light Jeweled alike - when they noticed he finally now wore a collar like the rest of the light Jeweled at Court. He tried to smile like it didn't bother him. Most of the time he succeeded (at least when he was around other people). Other times he ended up locking himself in the pantry again, curled up in a little ball, trying desperately not to scream or reach for the nearest sharp object.

Today was a bad day. He hadn't slept more than a cumulative couple of hours the night before, fighting the urge to fall back on some old habits he'd promised himself he'd not turn back to. He'd hoped that getting to work would help distract him, but even that was proving challenging. His mind couldn't focus, his hands wouldn't stop shaking, and his chest was so tight just taking small breaths was becoming difficult. There was this heavy pressure over his whole body that if he made too big of a motion, too took deep of a breath, moved just a little bit too fast, everything would crumbled and he'd lose whatever tenuous control he still had.

He started getting a dizzy and his vision started to spot before he realized he had been holding his breath. It took another extra couple seconds for him to build up the resolve to let out the air he'd been clinging to on a slow, carefully controlled exhale and take in another.

'In.. two.. three... out... two.. three...'

Raj's deep, steady voice remembered in the back of his mind. The Warlord Prince had found him that day, hiding in the pantry. He'd managed to calm him down - and he'd done it again several times since then as well, using breathing exercises and constant, patient reassurance. It didn't fix things, not remotely, but it helped.

Warren set down the pan he was holding before he dropped it, then he pressed his palms into the edge of the counter and bowed his head, focusing as hard as he could on the memory of Raj's steady voice. Then he breathed, trying to focus only on the breathing and nothing else, not even the desperate prayers that it would work.

In.. two... three... out... two three...

Offline Jakob Volkshund

  • Character Account
    • white2rose
    • wp
    • Role

      Third Circle

    • Faction

      Ivalo Province Court

    • Territory

      Glacia

    • Character Sheet

      [Link]

    • OOC

      halyonix

    • Posts

      59

    • the Queen's hound

    • View Profile
Re: In 2...3... Out 2...3...
« Reply #1 on: Jun 20, 18, 02:12:24 PM »
It had been a harrowing few weeks but at least he hadn’t had to work with that asshole Kain anymore.

Okay, it hadn’t been harrowing so much as it had been a frustrating sort of boring. Jakob, used to a semi-nomadic lifestyle, now found himself remaining closer to his new “home” for many reasons: primarily, his Queen, Miina. But second to that came this two-fold stigma -- he was a former acquaintance to the Underground (hey, just their transporter, okay? Marks were marks, fuck you) and now a Light-Jeweled Bound to a Red Queen.

He had been happy riding that grey line between good and bad. Now, he was happy riding the curve of Miina’s body.

Except that she didn’t always have need of a sex toy and because Jakob couldn’t just go pick up with his old connections, like he normally would have, and he didn’t really have any other skills to offer Miina in a Courtly setting, he was stuck in this sort of damned limbo, waiting for a job. Which meant that he was bored, and that meant the Kalas estate had a frustrated Warlord Prince prowling listlessly throughout its halls.

At least he hadn’t threatened anyone yet. He wasn’t that untamed.

Jakob decided to see what sort of entertainment could be found in the kitchens. Hell, maybe he would even learn how to cook something besides shitty dry chicken. He’d never have enough patience to do pastries, not like Warren did, but didn’t mean he couldn’t learn a new trick or two.

“What’s shaking, kiddo?” Jakob asked nonchalantly as he strode into the kitchen with his hands in his pockets, slapping on a roguish grin to cover the fact that he was bored out of his mind. “Got any cookies that need eating?”

Offline Warren Winters

  • Character Account
    • white2te
    • warlord
    • Role

      Head Chef

    • Faction

      Ivalo Province Court

    • Territory

      Glacia

    • Character Sheet

      [Link]

    • OOC

      WrenStar

    • Posts

      33

    • View Profile
Re: In 2...3... Out 2...3...
« Reply #2 on: Jun 30, 18, 04:00:26 PM »
Warren almost choked on his own breath, and did end up biting down uncomfortably hard on the inside of his cheek at the sudden sound and presence of another. His hands shook as they fussed down his apron and he caught his breath - though his eyes were perhaps still a little bit too wide as he struggled to right himself and turn to face the other male.

“P-Prince. Hey..” His smile was a weak attempt at cheer, but he was trying, and at least he wasn’t curled up in a little ball in the corner. Some how he didn’t think Prince Volkshund would be terribly impressed with a mid-afternoon panic attack - even if it did come with a side order of muffins.

So he took a deep breath, winced at how shaky it was, then took another, and had to turn away from the Warlord Prince because it was way too fucking obvious he was struggling with something.

“Cookies? Oh, I think.. there should be some on the counter. From last night.” He made a vague gesture down the counter to where there was a plate covered with a glass dome to keep in the freshness. He’d baked them after his first attempt at sleep, before he’d ultimately knocked on Raj’s door and cuddled up next to him, letting the other male’s warmth and reassurance lull him into a brief slumber. A sharply aching part of him, though, had craved the calming touch of his Queen - had wanted to curl up next to her and let her presence sooth him, wash over him. There was a bigger part though that didn’t want to go anywhere near her.

And an even bigger part that resented himself for wanting that touch. That hated himself for this inner conflict. That desperately wished he could fall completely on one side of the scale - either get over it and comply, or rebel and probably die in the process… but at least it would mean he wouldn’t have to wear the collar anymore.

“I was just about to make.. something. Was there anything you wanted?” He couldn’t even remember what it was he’d been prepping.

Offline Jakob Volkshund

  • Character Account
    • white2rose
    • wp
    • Role

      Third Circle

    • Faction

      Ivalo Province Court

    • Territory

      Glacia

    • Character Sheet

      [Link]

    • OOC

      halyonix

    • Posts

      59

    • the Queen's hound

    • View Profile
Re: In 2...3... Out 2...3...
« Reply #3 on: Jul 26, 18, 03:16:00 PM »
The way the kid acted, like he had been caught or scared, had Jakob arching one eyebrow curiously. Warren stammered through a greeting, took a few shaky breaths, and then gestured towards the opposite counter. Under a glass dome, a few cookies remained. Jakob went to investigate. He picked one up, sniffed it, and then looked at it again.

Blech. Nuts. He hated nuts. But he ate one anyway, just to please the kid.

“I was just about to make.. something,” the kid said, “Was there anything you wanted?” Funny. He didn’t look like he was making something. He looked like he was...lost. There was a pan near his hand, a cutting board too, but not much else. He looked like he was starting something but couldn’t figure out what. Wasn’t like Jakob knew much about cooking anyway.

A chef getting lost in the kitchen though? Something was up. The kid really wasn’t acting like his usual, jovial, shrimpy self.

“There’s always something that I want but you aren’t my type, sorry. Something on your mind, kid? Court boys giving you problems?” Jakob asked, leaning against the counter, giving Warren plenty of space. “You don’t look yourself.” He’d thought of Warren as a rabbit before but now it really seemed to be true.

Jakob crossed his arms over his chest, initiating a casual, listening sort of pose. A quick glance of his eyes towards the fruit bowl had an apple floating his way, which he captured from the air and bit into loudly, obviously settling in for Warren to explain what was going on. "Spill," he said. "What's up?"

Offline Warren Winters

  • Character Account
    • white2te
    • warlord
    • Role

      Head Chef

    • Faction

      Ivalo Province Court

    • Territory

      Glacia

    • Character Sheet

      [Link]

    • OOC

      WrenStar

    • Posts

      33

    • View Profile
Re: In 2...3... Out 2...3...
« Reply #4 on: Aug 07, 18, 01:06:13 PM »
A shadow of a smile twitched on his lips at Jakob's quip about wants and the (in Warren's opinion) unfortunate fact that the Tiger Eye Warlord wasn't quite his type. On a day where he had his shit together, he might have chuckled and taken the opportunity to flirt with the other man a little bit. Jake was usually in good spirits about it - he seemed to understand that Warren just liked to flirt and did respect that Jack was disappointingly heterosexual.

'Something on your mind, kid? Court boys giving you problems?'

"O-oh, no, nothing like that," he said with a small smile. If that's all this was he could handle that just fine. A little bit of heartache was easily mended or distracted from with his work, and he was typically able to work through those struggles without spiraling too badly.

'You don't look yourself...'

Warren glanced over at him again, then away, shoulders hunching just a little bit in shame, his gaze firmly locking on to the fine tremor that had wrested control of his hands. Damnit, he was usually so much better at this. Even on his really bad days he was usually able to put on a mask - at least for as long as there was someone else in the room. It was exhausting, but it was what it was. But now...

He swallowed, and his throat moved against the thin, elegant noose about his neck. He froze, then shuddered lightly as his eyes pressed shut. The whole room was just too big. Too open. It was just the two of them, but somehow the room just seemed so loud. Was it raining outside, or was that just the blood rushing in his ears?

'Spill. What's up?'

His mouth tightened, and there was a whisper of a sound at the back of his throat that was closer to a whimper than anything else. He looked over at Jakob again then, and his eyes landed on the matching collar that the other light-Jeweled male wore. His gaze lingered there for a moment, then drifted up to lock with Jake's. For just a moment, it held - and had Jake any intuition at all he would be able to see the younger man's agony.

"I'm fine," he croaked quietly. "I'm just.. adjusting."

 

 

anything